Having been so intensely busy for the last year that my participation in online martial arts sites has waned considerably, it was a source of some surprise to me (not to mention a little bit of pride) that a significant edit had been added, then reverted out of, the Wikipedia entry that is maintained about me.
(If you need a reason to doubt the veracity of any information cited in Wikipedia, consider for a moment that this is an “encyclopedia” that has me as an entry. Never trust a reference that includes me.)
The added, then removed entry read as follows, and apparently carries on in the tradition of the Romani Claw Boxing Challenge:
Presumably during the spring of 2008, a man claiming to be a Romani “claw-boxer” challenged Elmore to a fight. The anonymous fighter claimed to be expert in several weapons, including “double-ended longsword, stiletto, foot-blade, and Glock.” (“Some folks calls it a sling blade, but I calls it a foot-blade.”) He claims to have earned a maroon sash in his art, which is “the second highest level of skill attainable for an intermediate claw-fighter.” Regarding himself as a philosopher-warrior, not unlike Elmore, the mysterious individual wished to determine once and for all whose school was superior. Elmore posted the challenge on his Myspace account on March 5th, prompting a four page discussion on the popular martial arts forum Bullshido. One individual claiming to be “Kane Lautari,” the claw boxer, left a series of enigmatic messages on the forum, but it is unclear whether it is fact the author of the original challenge. Moreover, is unclear if the challenge is in fact genuine; some members of the martial arts community have suggested trolling as a possible explanation, while others speculate that Elmore himself wrote the challenge to inflate his own image. The Bullshido member known as Kane Lautari was later banned from the site, for reasons unknown.
I like the implication that I am a philosopher-warrior. That’s kind of neat. I only wish I was as creative as this “Kane” fellow (who signed his e-mails as Lautari, apparently, but whose e-mail lists his last name as Roseworth), whose original claw-boxing e-mail was utterly brilliant in its parody of these types of personalities.
I’m not sure how making up obviously absurd challenges ‘inflates my ego,’ but where the support group that is Bullshido is concerned (the site is a notorious trolling venue for would-be martial artists and self-proclaimed skeptics concerning martial arts claims, which is notable for its vulgarity and its harassment of almost everyone in the martial arts community) any amount of bizarre conspiracy theorizing is entertained.
For the record, what inflates my ego is discovering that people who do not like me spend the time to engage in a “four page discussion” about me based on things posted on my forum or my blog.
Interestingly, it would appear that Kane the Mysterious Claw Boxer made good on his previous threat to tell the world I would not accept his challenge:
—– Original Message —-
From: Kane Roseworth
To: Phil Elmore
Sent: Monday, April 7, 2008 4:15:53 AM
Subject: Re: challengei see you have chosen to show this on disvirtuous site of myspace. we did not think a philosopher would advertise his coward so loud. you try to disccredit claw boxing, but the truth will ring out and every martial artist will know of your coward
kl
Be advised, my faithful disciples, ardent readers, fellow bloggers, and dedicated critics: If suddenly and enigmatically I disappear without a trace, you will know that the fated claw-boxing death match has occurred, and I have failed to defend my honor. Should I meet my presumably disvirtuous end in this fashion, it is safe to assume that, yes, I have advertised my coward, and advertised it loud.
“In pace requiescat!”