The Martialist: The Magazine For Those Who Fight Unfairly

“Stay ‘unreasonable.’  If you
don’t like the solutions [available to you], come up with your
own.” 
Dan Webre

The Martialist does not
constitute legal advice.  It is for ENTERTAINMENT
PURPOSES ONLY.

Copyright © Phil Elmore, all rights
reserved.

Understanding Instructor Immaturity

By Phil Elmore

Editor’s Note:  It came to my attention some
time after publishing this article that more than one reader had concluded,
wrongly, that I was implying serious character flaws in instructors
with whom I’ve worked personally (especially recently).  Please be
aware, as you read this, that no indictment of any instructor under
whom I have studied is implied or should be construed.  I have
worked with almost as many teachers as I have logged years in the martial
arts – the benefit and the curse of the short-attention-span-theater
approach.  Those few instructors towards whom I might feel negatively
inclined are NOT and never have been mentioned by name in the virtual pages
of The Martialist.  They are not people with whom I stay in
touch (nor have I had any contact with them for years).

In the years I have studied the martial arts I’ve had the privilege of working with some truly talented instructors. In my capacity as as publisher of
The Martialist, I’ve had the opportunity to meet and to interact with many more teachers and their students. Several of these men and women are people for whom I have great respect to this day. My experiences in the martial arts have been overwhelmingly positive. I have, however, also
learned of some instructors and their students who suffered from serious character flaws.

The most common problem instructors face is, in my opinion, that of immaturity. The reason this flaw is so common is because all teachers suffer from it to some degree when they start. Everyone begins somewhere; no teacher springs to life from the forehead of another, fully formed and experienced. All teachers go through a learning process every bit as important, if not more so, than they did as students. To learn a skill and to impart it cogently to others are not the same thing. I have known less-than-gifted technicians who were very good at explaining to others how to do something correctly; I have known masters of the martial arts (that is my term, not theirs) who were terrible at teaching others; I have known competent teachers who had natural (and learned) skill in the craft of teaching, sometimes across multiple fields of endeavor. What all of them had in common was that they weren’t as capable, as mature, or as confident as teachers when they started as when they’d been at it for several years.

Instructor maturity is not, however, primarily a function of hours logged in the dojo or kwoon. It is as much, if not more, a symptom of the instructor’s personality
and character. Some instructors, no matter how many years they spend teaching, will always be immature compared to others. There is no single, quantifiable scale against which to judge your instructor’s maturity, but there are some warning signs of which you should be aware. If your instructor exhibits many of these symptoms, it might be time to consider finding another teacher. This can be quite difficult, because many of us venerate and respect our instructors, willingly overlooking their flaws. Our teachers are, after all, only human. While this is only too true, you cannot afford to suspend your process of critical thought where your martial education is concerned. To do so is to risk your own health, well-being, finances, and preparation for the future.

Warning Signs of Instructor Immaturity

Your Instructor Needs to Be The Toughest Guy in the Room. If your instructor cannot watch a group of students engage in a drill without getting in on that drill himself
– particularly if he has a reputation for beating hard
on students when he does so – it’s because he needs to remind himself (and
those watching and participating) that he’s still tougher and better than his
students.  

(Please note that I am not saying any instructor who
engages in drills with his students is being immature.  If he or she
suffers a compulsive need to get in on those drills, a need to
prove something to himself and to those students, that is an issue. 
Occasional or even frequent participation in drills, apart from that need, is
not in and of itself a warning sign.)

Students are often in awe of the skill level of their instructor and
may excuse physical abuse on the grounds that the teacher is simply that much
better (and thus doesn’t mean to harm his students). Worse, such an instructor
may justify physical abuse by saying that students need to know “what it feels
like.” Simply put, if your instructor is arrogant rather than humble – and
particularly if he compares himself favorably to others, puts down students’
skills, or otherwise demeans his peers – he’s immature.

Your Instructor Pays Lip-service to “Respect” For Other Styles But Bashes Them and Their Practitioners. A teacher’s immaturity is often expressed as a feeling of smug superiority where his style, his school, or his students are concerned. Anyone who chooses not to train with him is misguided, misinformed, or stupid. Any style that is not his own is inferior. Many immature instructors, because they understand how bashing other schools and styles sounds, will state officially that they have nothing but respect for other styles. They may even institute rules telling their students that members of the dojo, kwoon,
or club are not to speak ill of other martial arts and practitioners. They
will do this, however, while occasionally letting slip their true feelings,
denigrating other programs and pupils to varying degrees of severity. This is
a pattern of behavior that is not always immediately apparent. It sometimes
takes a while for it to emerge fully and obviously to the student, especially
if he or she is lulled by the instructors’ contrary (but insincere) statements
of tolerance.

Your Instructor is Offended or Threatened by the Work of Others.
An immature teacher will react noticeably and obviously to articles, books,
instructors, programs, and styles with which he disagrees. Hey may get so
angry that he writes material to refute what has offended him, be these
statements of general policy or formal rebuttals of someone else’s essay or
editorial. He may go out of his way to make it publicly known that he does not
approve of the work, personality, or style in question. The key to
differentiating this reaction from the emotions most reasonable people would
experience when confronted with opposing opinions is the degree to which the
instructor becomes irate.

Your Instructor Encourages Students to Accept Challenges From Other Schools’ Practitioners. There are a lot of instructors out there who still see the martial arts as some sort of Bruce Lee movie or Sonny Chiba film festival. A lot of instructors who adhere to this “old school” philosophy of the arts believe that dojos and kwoons
should still be policing themselves by gate crashing each others’ premises and
engaging in duels. Still others don’t go out of their way to look for trouble,
but believe when a challenge is offered (particularly on their own turf) that
it should be accepted to prove the interloper a lesson and vindicate their
claims and beliefs regarding the efficacy of their teaching. Challenge matches
are stupid, immature, and potentially quite dangerous, particularly in our
litigious society. Any instructor who would even entertain the idea of
accepting such a challenge (or who would encourage a pupil to accept such a
challenge) from a hostile party is a danger to himself and his students.

Your Instructor “Has a Temper.” If your instructor is a hothead
– easily angered and perhaps even known for his temper – he is not mature. Maturity in the martial arts brings with it an even-tempered nature that is evident in all good teachers to varying degrees. An instructor who cannot master his anger
– or, worse, an instructor who takes out his bad moods on his students through verbal or physical abuse
– has much to learn. He also has much to master about himself.

Your Instructor Regularly Makes a Fool of Himself Online.
If your instructor acts like a troll on the Web, can’t express himself well,
or otherwise makes more enemies than he needs to make, some aspect of him is
immature. There are a lot of gifted instructors out there who just can’t cope
with the nature of online discourse, so this isn’t a definitive warning sign.
If your instructor behaves in ways that make you ashamed to stick up for him,
however – or if you find yourself apologizing for him all the time – there’s
a problem and you both know it.

Your Instructor Flirts with Students. If your instructor is careful not to behave inappropriately with students of the opposite (or the same) sex but nevertheless flirts with students to whom he or she is attracted, that is an aspect of immaturity. Many male teachers never
overcome this tendency.   (Please note that I am referring to widely
reported incidents of sexual harassment and exploitation in the martial arts
in general, NOT to any direct knowledge or experience in the course of
my own studies.  I have NEVER witnessed any
sort of inappropriate intimate contact among the teachers and students with
whom I have associated.)

Your Instructor Doesn’t Obey His Own Rules. If your instructor regularly sets rules for his students but is far less than perfect in demonstrating adherence to those rules, he’s immature. It doesn’t matter what the rules are (though I’m thinking here in terms of general conduct in the dojo or kwoon). If your teacher lives by the motto, “Do as I say, not as I do,” he’s got some growing up to do.

This list is by no means complete. There are many other facets of immaturity we could chronicle in compiling a list of symptoms. If I’ve managed to state my case lucidly, reading this list should give you a general feel for the personality and demeanor of someone who may be a talented martial artist
– but who might not be the most mature teacher you’ve met.

A mature instructor knows what he knows – and he knows that he knows it. He is not concerned with what others are doing; he is only concerned with his own productive pursuits. He is humble, but not too modest. He is calm, friendly, and professional in his dealings with others
– even those with whom he disagrees. He speaks ill of no one without great provocation and speaks only reluctantly when he must be negative. He never denigrates a former or current student. He is as susceptible to accidents as any other teacher, but he is genuinely upset when a student is injured and strives to protect his students from physical harm in the course of training. Above all, he is patient and encouraging in that way that only a truly learned, truly mature teacher can be. A mature instructor has nothing to prove to anyone, doesn’t care what others think of him, and doesn’t waste his time with those who seek to challenge him. A mature instructor is someone in whom a student can place absolute trust.

To be an immature teacher is not necessarily to be a bad teacher. There are a great many instructors active in the martial arts and self-defense community who have much to learn about the craft of teaching
– and about themselves. Most of them will learn these things in time. They will look back with
chagrin on the attitudes of their youth and they will do what they can to help other students and fellow teachers. Simply because your teacher exhibits one or two of the symptoms here does not mean you should drop him, abandon your school, and go in search of a wrinkled and Yoda-like exemplar of ancient wisdom and equanimity. If your teacher exhibits many of these signs, however
– or if he exhibits any one of them to an extreme degree – please do reconsider what you are doing and where you are studying. You owe it to yourself
– and to your instructor – to approach your studies with an active mind and a critical outlook.

To do less is to do yourself and your school a disservice.